From Being Strangers to Becoming Couples: Christan Couples Shares Tale of God’s Love, Boundaries In Courtship, journey into Marriage
God gave my husband a theme for the wedding even before we met… – Olateju Ekerin (The bride)
WiGRadio Team: Can we meet you?
Mr. Ayomide Ekerin: My name is Ayomide Ekerin. A child of God and a husband of one. I’m a graduate of Mass communication from the University of Lagos. I’m a digital and content strategist currently working with a fintech here in Lagos.
Mrs. Olateju Ekerin: My name is Olateju. Abba’s favourite babygirl. Wife to one and one alone. I am a graduate of Statistics from Ladoke Akintola University of Technology. I am the creative director of House of Tehilah Designs, a female fashion brand here in Lagos.
WiGRadio Team: Tell us about your salvation experience
Mr. Ayomide Ekerin: I gave my life to Christ as a teenager. I think back in 2007 at Foursquare Gospel Church, Shomolu. Prior to that I had been a church boy born into a Christian home. My mum was even a minister. And I wasn’t a problematic child per se. I just realized that there was something more beyond the life I was living. And everything came to a head that Sunday morning while listening to the a message about the Father’s love. It changed everything for me about how I saw God. I answered the altar call there and then. And the rest is history
Mrs. Olateju Ekerin: Gave my life to christ in January, 2008. I had been a churchgirl growing up and believed that going to church meant being saved. It was until I had an encounter that changed my orientation, there and then, I decide to confess christ as my Lord and saviour, and it’s a Christ in me journey all the way.
WiGRadio Team: How, when and where did you meet?
Mrs. Olateju Ekerin: We met June 12th, 2019 through a mutual friend
Mr. Ayomide Ekerin: We met through a mutual friend. The Day was June 12, 2019. I just resigned from my former place of work, but I sort of went to hang with my friends there and do a few work. So one of my friends said he wanted to say hi to a former school mate that he hasn’t seen in a while. Na so he say make I tag along o. My wife happened to be the person we were going to meet. After that first hangout. We became friends but we didn’t start dating until 2022
WiGRadio Team: Was it a case of love at first sight? That is, was Mr. Ayomide at the time your spec? Did he tick all the boxes for your kind of man ma?
Mrs. Olateju Ekerin: Nooooo, wasn’t love at first sight. We just connected as friends. I wasn’t even thinking of dating or marrying him at that time.
WiGRadio Team: Aside from the connection, how did you get your confirmation that he is the one?
Mrs. Olateju Ekerin: I had my confirmation from a scripture God gave me before he proposed. I was praying about someone else that asked me out when I heard No, for that person and then the scripture. So when he eventually came and proposed, I heard The scripture again and “Yes” this time. Also carried two of my mentors along and they were all positive.
WiGRadio Team: Did you like her at first sight? That is, was she your spec? Did she tick all the boxes for your kind of woman?
Mr. Ayomide Ekerin: I just saw her as a fine sister of God. Dassal. The thing is that I often compartmentalize my relationships. Once you’re in friend zone, that’s where you’ll be. I used to think that the person I’ll marry will be someone that’s not in my circle or that I don’t currently know. And we attended the same denomination so she used to invite me to her parish when they had special events. And Joshua Selman programme too. So I wasn’t looking at her at all
WiGRadio Team: So when was the veil removed sir?
Mr. Ayomide Ekerin: I guess it was when Jesus tore the veil ooo. Lol. I think I thought of her once during the period of our friendship, but I jettisoned the idea. And then, during our friendship, we can go off for a long time, but we always reconnect. In 2022, we had not been in touch, I think since my birthday in February. Then in May, we reconnected again. I’m a homie and she had always encouraged me to take some time out. So we decided to hangout. That was the day the scales fell off, it was as if I hadn’t seen her before. From that day on I started thinking, this person is the one ó. I had not even prayed about it. But I didn’t tell her I liked her. Because I was thinking we just reconnected. Then one evening, I told her how I felt. Fortunately, the feeling was mutual. I told her to go pray about it and talk to her mentors and I would also do the same. We both received a word and we started courting
WiGRadio Team: Speaking about torn veil, spec and kind of woman, what is your take on ‘the will of God in choosing a marriage partner’ sir?
Mr. Ayomide Ekerin: I think is a good Father who gives his children the best gifts. And when it comes to marriage, His will is better than our so-called specs. To be honest, I had some “specifications” different from what my wife had. And then when the veil was opened, I saw that my specs were just good to haves. And I saw that God even gave me much more than my spec. It is better to wait on God.
WiGRadio Team: So it mean she did not meet you specification but the will of the father supersede our will but were you attracted to her sir?
Mr. Ayomide Ekerin: I was first attracted to her. Then I went to ask her Father who is also my Father and he gave me a go ahead
WiGRadio Team: Hmmm, okay sir. So you are saying “ATTRACTION” is salient at first sir?
Mr. Ayomide Ekerin: I think physical attraction is key. When God brought Eve to Adam, you should have seen the expression on his face. That’s why he said all those bone of my bone lines
WiGRadio Team: Considering that you guys were friends for a long time before entering the courtship stage, was there any challenges during courtship? I know most people will say they had communication issue, was it the same with you during courtship? and now that you are married any culture shocks yet?
Mrs. Olateju Ekerin: Well, no serious communication issues. Of course we will definitely have moments where we disagree to agree, but then, not something that posses a threat, not yet.
WiGRadio Team: Before courtship did you both discuss about your genotype and blood group whether the fact God told you he is the one, she is the one and what are your view concerning this sir/ma?
Mrs. Olateju Ekerin: Yes we did. Took our medical test again during courtship.
WiGRadio Team: Alright, so there is a saying that a successful and godly courtship takes work, how were you able to manage your attraction to one another and keep the boundaries?
Mr. Ayomide Ekerin: As believers, we knew there were some things that were not allowed for us in courtship. We had discussed some of the boundaries we needed to have. For instance, I don’t think she ever slept over at my house until I had an accident and needed to be watched. Over all, God helped us.
WiGRadio Team: @Mrs. Ekerin your husband said you guys already talked on boundaries, does this mean Mr. Ayomide was a gentleman all through?
Mrs. Olateju Ekerin: Yea, God helped us both ooo, we won’t even lie. It wasn’t all that easy for both of us, especially because there was attraction, but the word of God and the desire not to “burn” kept us through especially God’s grace.
WiGRadio Team: Just asking for other sisters in courtship whom the brother is always pressuring for a deep hug and have no idea about how to help brother calm down “…for the joy set ahead of them”. What were the practical things you did on your part to really help maintain the set boundaries during courtship?
Mrs. Olateju Ekerin: Like he said, not to sleep over at his house. We both also had boundaries as to what not to do… To be honest it was a work of both of us( because I saw in him also, the desire to stay pure) . Didn’t mean that there were times the body didn’t make demands, that was also the time that as a lady (whom might actually be a bit saner and stronger sometimes), you are to stand your ground. I strongly believe that no one can make you do things if you don’t want to do.
WiGRadio Team: What part of your lives together do you look forward to most?
Mr. Ayomide Ekerin: Every part. I look forward to us winning together
WiGRadio Team: How do you consider finances(money) role in the marriage?
Mrs. Olateju Ekerin: Love is sweet ooo, when money enter, love is sweeter. Money is important to any institution, especially marriage and it should be treated as such( not making money a god) but then, making effort to have enough and send it on the errands is should go. That been said, his money is our money and so is mine. We had money discussions during courtship and been working for us.
WiGRadio Team: @Mrs. Ekerin, what do you have to say to a sister that is getting married pretty soon?
Mrs. Olateju Ekerin: God can be trusted! He is a good Father that gives good gifts! Wait on Him… While you wait, prepare for the future you “a- (wait)”.
WiGRadio Team: It was nice having you sir/ma. Thank you so much for your time and opens
The Ekerins: Thank you so much for having us. We had a swell time with you.
WiGRadio Team: Lastly, @Mr. Ayomide Ekerin, what would you say to a brother that is getting married in few months?
Mr. Ayomide Ekerin: The zeal of the Lord will perform it. So rest. Focus on all God wants to teach you for the season. The truth is there is a lot of learning and relearning to do, and that’s the most important part, not the ceremony.